Swoop bangs and eyeliner.

It’s a sobering thing to come across old videos of yourself when the biggest stress in your life was the things going on in text conversations and what your hair looked like that day.

And oh how different you looked and how different you acted and how differently you thought about the world. Not to mention you had a slider phone that made a crystal noise when you got a text (I miss that phone).

You were trying to figure out who you were, vigorously living your life through others, letting your every emotion be ruled by a single influence. But, you were definitely carefree. And that’s more than you can say now.

I’m not saying I want to go back and be that 17-year-old girl with the short hair and long bangs in her face. I much prefer the current 23-year-old self who’s nearly attained her college degree in music and never knew she’d spend so many hours of her life playing violin.

I have one thing in common with that 17-year-old girl I saw in that camera. We’re both up at 1am, not able to sleep.

I’m sitting in nearly the same place as that video from 6 years ago. That’s really weird (for lack of a more eloquent term). My room is different now, though. Only a few posters left, the bed in the middle of the room, hand weights resting on the floor from today’s work out, hardly anything on the shelves or in the closet (since I’m only home for a month or so). Life has moved on from this bedroom I spent so many hours staying up late in. People have changed along with it. I hardly talk to those two people I was texting in that video. Actually, I never talk to one of them, and the other is too busy with their own life problems to find time for me (which I am not saying in an attitude of bitterness, but more matter-of-fact).

I’m not sure what the point of this post is, really. Reminiscing is a little odd, I guess. Time passes and you don’t even notice.

Record keeping is so important.